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When you get so excited about RPing with a particular person because they’re really good and you can’t wait for their next reply



Pro tip: start watching Free! as a joke then notice how your life turns into an emotional wreck after that 

It’s over


As soon as the younger male had gotten the text, it lighting up the screen almost instantly after he’d sent his, Rin couldn’t help but to smile. That was so typical of Haruka to say. Unlike himself, Haru had never been selfish. He didn’t know whether he should be upset that Haru wasn’t fighting for him, or happy to know that the male still cared for him enough to spend time with his mother and sister, and to watch his races on television. Clearly that meant Haruka Nanase still cared, right? Still loved him?

He stared at the text for a moment, sharp teeth biting into his lower lip. He wanted to see Haruka. So badly. He wanted to see the others too, of course. His friends. They were the reason he’d gotten back into swimming. They’d saved him from the spiraling downfall of hatred that he had started to become, and gave him a reason to swim. But he could just imagine his boyfriends - exboyfriends, he thought with disappointment - face as he would get off the plane. He would be shoved right back on.

The next text came, and Rin instantly frowned once more. Was something wrong? Everything was wrong. And he knew why. He knew exactly why. It was something he’d revealed to Sousuke. He deserved to be just as open, if not more so, with the boy he loved.

[MSG]: Swimming here isn’t the same. Not without you. You saved me, Haruka. You, and the rest of my friends. You saved me from myself. You made me realize that I had a real reason to swim, and it wasn’t just to reach the goals of my father, but to reach the goals of myself. To swim as a team. With people I love more than anything.

As he sent it, a weight felt lifted from him. He had been hiding so much of himself from Haruka, and he knew that was something he shouldn’t be doing. Not again. When he’d gone to Australia, he had stopped writing to everyone. His best friend. His family. He’d secluded himself, and became a shell of self-hatred. Now that he was in America, he didn’t want that again. But just writing that to Haruka, being so open with him, already made him feel fifty times better. His fingers hesitated for a moment, before typing again.

[MSG]: I don’t know why I’m telling you this now. No….I know why. It’s because, Haru, you’re my reason to swim. You’re my reason for everything. I want to swim with you again.

As soon as he sent the text, the door flew open, one of his team mates yelling that Rin was going to be late to the match if he didn’t hurry up. Rin groaned, rubbing his eyes, though looked at his phone with a shy smile. He didn’t know how Haruka was going to respond to that, but maybe, maybe everything would be okay again.

Shoving Rin right back on a plane was not meant to be taken as Haruka wanting to get rid of him. Truth be told, he wanted him back more than anything but the idea of standing in his way, of Rin giving up his dream for him was too much. Such a thing would only end badly for them both and Haruka couldn’t allow him to throw everything away just for him. Not when he could have both, not when he could return home to know that Haruka had waited, despite being told not to.

But it was Rin who had ended this. Rin who had spoken those fateful words and Rin who had lessened their contact. For him to say these things now… It just didn’t make sense.

His words showed longing and desperation, both of which instilled a hope in Haruka he’d tried so hard to push away.

Don’t do this to me…

Don’t get my hopes up for nothing…

Because nothing would be more painful than having to hear, once more, that what they’d had couldn’t continue.

[MSG]; You don’t need us to physically be there, Rin. You don’t need to swim with us to know we’re still here supporting you and that we’ll be here when you return.

He knew Rin could do it. He knew that if he really tried he could chase his dreams and return home to gloat like he’d always planned to.

He didn’t need Haruka to achieve what he was already capable of. He was stronger now, strong enough to make it without him.




Send ⁇ for a drunk text

[Text]: Sssssssuuupp

[Text]: Youjm’re my honewy bunny

[Text]: OMG! I can’t writewew

[Text]: Hold on!

[Text]: *photo attached*

[MSG]; Pfttt. One thing for sure, if I didn’t send yesterday’s nude to anyone else but you when I was drunk, I am sure I won’t be doing that mistake while I’m sober.

[MSG]; But, if that ever happens, I’m sure that whoever gets the picture would be grateful for my mistake ;)

[MSG]; It’s your turn! Send me one!!!

[MSG]; C’mon!! My head hurts, I need your picture!

[MSG]; I am definitely NOT sending you that kind of picture.

He’d been lucky to get selfies and video calls out of him, but this was just going too far.

No Rin.

Sorry Rin.

Not happening.

It started with a text.


“You look pretty tired in my opinion.” Rin said as he placed his hand softly on Haruka’s knee. With a gentle smile, Rin came up with a suggestion he actually was looking forward to. “Here, why don’t you use me as your pillow and take a nap until we get home?”

He was just a hopeless romantic, ever since he met Haru and realized what he felt for him, Rin had always been dreaming doing with him what normal couples did together: hold hands, kiss, laugh… and even resting their head on their partner’s shoulder. Rin couldn’t hide how his eyes got brighter with the single idea of being Haruka’s pillow for a while.

“I’ll wake you up, don’t worry.” he added. “I know in which station we’re supposed to get down, anyway.”

His eyes lazily trailed down to the hand at his knee, though he found no reason to respond to Rin’s statement and confirm that he was indeed tired when the other knew that well enough.

The suggestion that came next took him by surprise though and he found himself focusing much more intently on Rin’s hand so he didn’t have to meet his eyes and reveal his flushed face. 

"But… we’re in public…" And this train was definitely more crowded than their secluded little corner of the airport.

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to - actually, he really did - but it didn’t change the fact that it was not normal to see two guys doing such things together.

He couldn’t really say he cared what other people thought either, but the idea of them seeing and making their distaste obvious unsettled Haruka. More so the idea that Rin might be more offended by it than him because, even though Rin had suggested it, Haru was afraid to do anything that might make their time together uncomfortable.

Fight or Fall


     His grip was tight. It didn’t really matter to Haruka; as he knew he himself was holding on for dear life as he held him close, resting his lips against his crown, just a brush, but enough. He could feel the damp wetness of his tears against his chest, and knew that Rin was struggling with this. With his own feelings, and with the developments, Haruka’s condition. And it hurt him.

     He shouldn’t be crying for me. He shouldn’t be crying; not this kind of crying…

     Biting his lip, he pulled back just slightly, a hand sliding into Rin’s hair. Turning his lips down against the swimmer’s forehead, he gave a gentle kiss to the skin, shaking his head against Rin’s words. No, he wasn’t like that. He wasn’t a crybaby, he was just emotional.

     Haruka understood that. Just because Rin cried, didn’t mean it made him a crybaby. It made him sensitive; it made him understanding. It make him emotional. It made him more open with his emotions than he was, and sometimes Haru was almost jealous of the fact that he was capable of crying.

     “No,” blue eyes gazed down at him almost gently, a longing of melancholy in his eyes as he threaded his hand through his hair, pulling him back towards his chest. “Just because you cry… doesn’t make you a crybaby. It makes you Rin.” His words quiet, dulcet, yet echoing otherworldly almost into his ear, giving a small shiver.

     And I wouldn’t have it any other way.

     “I don’t want you to cry for me, seeing you cry in sadness is… the worst.”

     I’d much rather see you smile, with tears running down your cheeks, than to see the agony and the helplessness, and feel your tears as if they were my own.

     “So don’t cry… you shouldn’t cry for me, cause I’m not going to leave you… I won’t.” Haruka murmured to him, his arms tightening around him, breathing deeply into the steaming air. “I won’t… I won’t……”

It makes you Rin.

"Hah, isn’t it the same thing?" He couldn’t help but laugh as he nuzzled into Haru’s skin once more, this time much calmer than before.

It was surprising how he could go from so many tears to this in a moment but it was as if the tears had been necessary for him to obtain this calm, only now, Haruka was upset too.

His touch was oh so comforting though, those hands in his hair felt so soft, so intimate, even in the most innocent of touches and it was Haruka…

God he loved him.

Loved how, even now, he could be so concerned for Rin, despite everything else falling around him, despite even Rin being able to hold himself together.

How had he been so lucky as to have him in his life?

"I’m sorry, Haru." His arms looped around Haruka’s check, his fingers finding the raven’s shoulders to pull him into even closer a hug. "I didn’t mean to worry you."

I didn’t mean to add to your problems…

"You will come home…" He just had to. Haruka had said so himself, and he wouldn’t give up so easily, "I won’t let it be any other way."